98) Create In Me A Clean Heart

Lent is upon us, the season of prayer, fasting and almsgiving. It’s a season of repentance, allowing the Holy Spirit to search our hearts, find what needs God’s Hand of Mercy, and drawing us to the Sacrament of Reconciliation to be washed clean in preparation for the celebration of Easter! The phrase “blot out or sins” has always caused me to stop and pay attention – Ps 51:9b calls for God to “turn away Thy face from my sins, and blot out all my iniquities.” What would that look like? The answer came to me in a moment of grace a few years ago.

A friend shared that there was a particular memory that the enemy often brought to her mind, and which had always been a source of deep shame. It happened so long ago, but kept re-appearing at times when she was tempted to slip into desolation and forget that the Lord had forgiven her of that failure. She had confessed it in a general way, but never specifically, and felt that God was calling her to go deeper in repentance.

The opportunity presented itself on retreat with a holy priest. After a beautiful talk about the healing gift of the Sacrament of Reconciliation, she approached the confessional and shared in detail the specifics of the sin. The good priest heard her confession, blessed her for her desire to be cleansed of the residue from this transgression, and absolved her of this sin. She left the confessional feeling the weight lifted, and in gratitude went to the chapel for Adoration, to thank God for this deeper cleansing.


As she sat before the tabernacle, images began to play in her mind. She saw herself sitting there, with Mother Mary next to her, her arm gently encircling her. They sat together at the foot of a huge crucifix, and on her lap was a photo album with pictures of the sin she had confessed. These were the images that the enemy had often reminded her of and which had been the source of her shame. Then slowly and gently, drops of Jesus’ precious blood began to drip down from the crucifix, landing directly on the photos and blotting out the images. They were like bleach blots, that when they landed completely obliterated the pictures, until there were all just pure white. Pure white, innocence and purity restored!

She related that now whenever the enemy sought to resurrect those images, all she saw were the clean white photos in the album, and she was reminded of the drops of Jesus’ blood which had washed away her sins. It always filled her with great joy and peace, and the comfort of being held by Mary as she received this healing. It’s another sign of God’s ability to redeem, and to make all things new!

As I go to Reconciliation soon, in preparation to celebrate Christ’s Resurrection, I go in gratitude for this great gift of grace! Indeed, He “blots out all my iniquities!” and cleanses me from my sins – Praise God for His Goodness and Mercy!

Fifth Sorrowful Mystery – the Crucifixion

The opportunity for Reconciliation was always especially meaningful when celebrated at the Cenacle of Our Lady of Divine Providence – it seems that the Lord often would bring up things from the past that were stumbling blocks to grace.

     At one of the sessions, I felt led to confess a sin of the past whose memory often haunted me.  I had confessed it in a general way previously, but now felt the need to be more explicit about the experience.  The priest was very helpful, as he assured me of God’s grace and mercy.  In thanksgiving, I went to the Adoration Chapel to express my gratitude to the Lord.

     As I sat before the tabernacle, the Lord gifted me with a beautiful image. I saw myself sitting on a bench beneath the Cross, with Mary sitting beside me with her arm around my shoulders.  In my lap I held a photo album – in it were pictures of the  situations I had confessed.  Jesus was on the Cross above us, and as we sat there, His precious Blood began to drip down on the photos, and each drop totally erased the pictures, making them white as if a drop of bleach had been put on them.  He was blotting out all those images with His precious Blood, so that I no longer saw them, but only saw a clean white frame, and felt the comfort of His Presence, and that of Our Blessed Mother.  Now whenever the enemy seeks to raise those pictures before my eyes again, all I see is that image of us sitting beneath the Cross, with those drops of precious Blood that make each photo all white.

      The Lord has blessed me several times by changing the way I remember a difficult experience.  Asking Him to show me where He was with me, or what He was doing, have brought forth images that provide healing grace to painful moments in time, and have allowed me to become more free.  What a beautiful way to bring healing, and to set the captives free!

     Lord God, thank You that You are a God outside of Time, Who has been with us throughout our lives and can bring healing and wholeness to all areas of our lives. Thank You for the healing balm of Your precious Blood, to wash away the stain of sin ~