Tag: Forgiveness

94) Advent Peace

We’re about to enter the third week of Advent, and the words “peace” and “forgiveness” have been on my mind a lot! It seems the two go together – we can’t really experience peace without living a forgiving life. I deeply desire to live in peace – the peace that keeps my heart at rest no matter what the outward circumstances are. I have an icon of St Seraphim of Sarov next to my desk, to remind me of one of his famous sayings: “Acquire interior peace, and many will find salvation near you.” I hope to help others grow in their relationship with God, to gain the salvation Jesus has suffered and died to give us. Living with interior peace brings a grace to others that may help open their hearts to God’s grace for them.

When walking with others in spiritual companionship, the topic of forgiveness often surfaces. I’m often prompted to share the YouTube by Larry Christenson on Unilateral Forgiveness, and in particular one of the stories he relates in it. He tells of a good friend who is deeply hurt and troubled by an injustice, such that she becomes embittered against the one who hurt her. She finds a deep peace in the quiet of a church that allows her to release the bitterness, and this is followed by a word from the Lord that has helped me a lot in my own life. She heard in her heart, “you never lose your peace over someone else’s sin, but only over your own.” She had lost her peace through her bitterness toward another, and not because of what they had done.

There are steps to take here, tied to the desire for peace and forgiveness. First is to acknowledge the injury, and to allow oneself to gently lean into the pain it has caused. We don’t want to over react to it, nor diminish it, but to name it and feel it.

The second step is often overlooked. We take our eyes off of the injury, and ask the Holy Spirit to convict us of how our own reaction may be in need of God’s forgiveness. In the case mentioned above, the need was to acknowledge the bitterness that had taken root in her heart, and to ask the Lord to forgive her for that. This is then followed by His gift of peace, freely given to every soul that honestly confesses their own sin, and seeks forgiveness. It also takes our eyes off someone else’s sin, and paves the way for us to offer a blessing for them, rather than ill will. In his article, Larry speaks about “beaming out forgiveness” to others, unilaterally. That is, from one side only – we don’t wait for them to ask for it, we offer it first. “Love your enemies, and pray for those who persecute you,” can only be done from the heart when we have allowed the Lord to cleanse us of our own sin, and receive His gift of peace.

Peace and forgiveness, partners hand in hand. May our Advent preparation include time to examine how we may have reacted and lost our peace in some circumstance, and allow the Lord to restore it through a good confession and extending blessing to others.

Lord God, I desire to be an agent of your peace and mercy. Help me to take my eyes off others’ failings, and allow you to use me to help others on their journey of faith. Thank you for Your gift of forgiveness – may I allow You to convict me quickly, that I may live in Your grace…

Link to Larry Christenson’s YouTube audio:

Larry Christenson – Unilateral Forgiveness & Empathetic Repentance

Track 1 – empathetic repentance. (20:25 min)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=Im8w7ihVid8

Track 2 – unilateral forgiveness. (19:27 min)
https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=9MBGwHO0MeM

62) Reconcilation gifting

The opportunity for Reconciliation was always especially meaningful when celebrated at the Cenacle of Our Lady of Divine Providence – it seems that the Lord often would bring up things from the past that were stumbling blocks to grace.

     At one of the sessions, I felt led to confess a sin of the past whose memory often haunted me.  I had confessed it in a general way previously, but now felt the need to be more explicit about the experience.  The priest was very helpful, as he assured me of God’s grace and mercy.  In thanksgiving, I went to the Adoration Chapel to express my gratitude to the Lord.

     As I sat before the tabernacle, the Lord gifted me with a beautiful image. I saw myself sitting on a bench beneath the Cross, with Mary sitting beside me with her arm around my shoulders.  In my lap I held a photo album – in it were pictures of the  situations I had confessed.  Jesus was on the Cross above us, and as we sat there, His precious Blood began to drip down on the photos, and each drop totally erased the pictures, making them white as if a drop of bleach had been put on them.  He was blotting out all those images with His precious Blood, so that I no longer saw them, but only saw a clean white frame, and felt the comfort of His Presence, and that of Our Blessed Mother.  Now whenever the enemy seeks to raise those pictures before my eyes again, all I see is that image of us sitting beneath the Cross, with those drops of precious Blood that make each photo all white.

      The Lord has blessed me several times by changing the way I remember a difficult experience.  Asking Him to show me where He was with me, or what He was doing, have brought forth images that provide healing grace to painful moments in time, and have allowed me to become more free.  What a beautiful way to bring healing, and to set the captives free!

     Lord God, thank You that You are a God outside of Time, Who has been with us throughout our lives and can bring healing and wholeness to all areas of our lives. Thank You for the healing balm of Your precious Blood, to wash away the stain of sin ~ 

(re-visited from Rosary Reflections, Sorrowful mystery, the Crucifixion. In this season of Lent, of Reconciliation, this memory has always blessed me. May it bring a blessing to others who may be unable to let go of images that want to rob us of our peace)

43: Genesis 49: Joseph’s grudge

     Forgiveness – over and over again, I come across the declaration that the greatest block to God’s grace is unforgiveness.  And God’s grace is such a tremendous gift, even necessity, to live this life in peace and happiness!  Peace, in the midst of whatever circumstance I find myself ~ as the old Quaker hymn asserts, “no storm can shake my inmost calm, when to that Rock I’m clinging.  If love is Lord of heaven and earth, how can I keep from singing?”  If Love is Lord – and it is from this Love that I receive the grace I desire to be at peace in my soul.

     At Mass this morning, our pastor related the story of a husband and wife who had a typical minor misunderstanding in their relationship.  What made it major however, was the reaction of the wife – she exploded in anger over her perceived injury.  The husband’s response stopped her in her tracks, as he asked, “How long have you been carrying that?”  Being a psychologist and one who helps others deal with their issues helped her to stop and understand the deeper message given to her, which showed an area of accumulated resentments, or grudges, that had been allowed to build up until it burst forth all out of proportion.

     Our pastor tied this in to Joseph’s brothers’ fear that Joseph was holding a grudge and that he would retaliate for the wrong that his brothers had done to him by selling him into slavery.  Joseph however had received God’s grace to recognize that what his brothers had meant for harm, God had used for good. He held no grudge against his brothers.  Indeed, God had used their sin to save their lives, and the lives of many others from starvation in the time of famine. Joseph didn’t hate them and would do them no harm.

     To hold a grudge, to harbor resentments, is like a daily dose of poison that accumulates in my body until it reaches a toxicity that causes an explosion, harming not only me but anyone who happens to get in the way.  Unforgiveness, how very deadly it is to my own well being, and often to those I love dearly!

     The antidote?  To keep a short account, to acknowledge and confess my sins as soon as I’m aware of them.  To do this, I need to take the time daily, or even more often, to reflect on the day’s happenings and take note of any area of resentment that may have cropped up!  And then to let it go, by God’s grace, along with a blessing for whatever triggered the resentment.  To douse the sparks before they grow into a deadly fire!

     Thank you Lord, for Your Word, that teaches me the best response in times of daily struggles.  May I be sensitive to the Spirit, Who enables me to recognize and let go of any potential resentments or grudges before they become deadly. I desire to live a forgiving life Lord, and be an agent of Your peace and mercy in this world….

Second Sorrowful Mystery – the Scourging at the Pillar

     We were at the Dunrovin Retreat Center near St. Paul, with a group of ladies from Transfiguration Parish in Woodbury for an Emmaus Retreat. Part of the retreat includes receiving a drawing that has been artistically created by another Emmaus sister, who has asked the Holy Spirit to inspire her with an image that will speak to the person who receives it with a personal message of God’s intimate love for them. 

      When all had received their drawings, we were given the opportunity to share how they spoke to us, or if there was some special significance for them.  The stories are often so beautiful and amazing, and truly do show that God works through our efforts to bring His love personally to the hearts of each of us.

      One of the ladies stood up and showed us the drawing she had received, which had 3 beautiful red fall leaves on it.  The Lord had touched her heart, and it was visible to us as she shared her story…

     There had been some free time in the afternoon, and some of the ladies had gone outside for a walk.  It was early October, and the leaves were just beginning to turn; the weather was cool and overcast, but a good time for quiet reflection and communion with  the Lord.  We had been assigned prayer partners, and she decided to pray a rosary for her prayer partner while she walked.  She chose the sorrowful mysteries, although it was Saturday, and was quietly praying the rosary and meditating on the second sorrowful mystery, the scourging at the pillar, and thinking about the precious blood Jesus had shed for us and the pain he had endured in the scourging.  Her heart was moved as she meditated on this mystery, and then she became aware that she was walking through an abundance of bright red leaves on the path, although she couldn’t identify any tree in the area where they might have fallen from.  She said she felt like she was walking right through His Blood, and It was covering us all with His protection and anointing.  It was a sacred and holy moment for her – she hadn’t mentioned it to anyone else.  And then when she received her drawing, there were these 3 bright red leaves…

     Thank You Lord, for Your intimate knowledge of each one of us, and for pouring Your Love into our hearts in so many unexpected and personal ways.  May we always have eyes open to see and ears open to hear that our hearts may be touched by Your grace and filled afresh with the fire of Your Love ~