faith – Page 2 – Spiritual Sun Pennies

84) I See You

On a recent pilgrimage / retreat, we were matched with a fellow pilgrim, whose identity we wouldn’t know until the end of the journey. It was suggested that we hold that person in our hearts, and during one of the quiet times during the trip, ask God for a word or image that would be meaningful for them. I had received words and images from others in prayer ministry, and recognized the gift this can be, so happily set aside a quiet moment to receive this grace for my secret fellow pilgrim.

As I prayed, the image of someone standing under a white blossoming tree came to my mind, and the Scripture where Jesus sees Nathanael under a tree and recognizes him as someone in whom there is no guile. I felt the Lord was saying to this person, “I see you. I know you. I know what’s on your heart. Come close to Me.” To test this thought and image, I returned to the exercise several times before the end of the pilgrimage, and the image and words remained true, and clear.

At the end of the pilgrimage, we gathered together and discovered who our secret partner was. I didn’t know her, and had not interacted with her on the trip. We were instructed to share what the Lord had given us for this person, so I told her what I had seen and heard. When I began, telling her Jesus had seen her standing under a white blossoming tree, she was visibly moved! She explained that at home she had a lilac tree that every other year had displayed beautiful purple blossoms, but for an unknown reason, this year the blossoms were white!

The words of Jesus, “I see you. I know you. I know what’s on your heart. Come close to me,” along with the image that was so very personal, were a blessed gift from God for my partner! There was no possible way I could have known she had a tree like that; God in His love and tenderness wanted her to know that He sees her, He knows her, He knows what she carries in her heart, and He desires that she come closer to Him! How much the Lord wants us to know that He knows everything about us, that He cares, and He desires an intimate relationship with us!

As is always the case when the Lord gives us the gift of bringing a blessing to another, the image and the words blessed me as well. God’s Word is filled with assurances of His love and and care for us. Ps 139 comes to mind here: “I have probed you and I know you. I know when you sit and when you stand. Your journeys and your rest I scrutinize. With all your ways I am familiar…”. These words from Scripture bring peace to our hearts, and when coupled with an image that only God could know, they are a powerful witness to the truth of His personal knowledge of us.

The second part of this word was the story from John 1:47 where Jesus declares “here truly is an Israelite in whom there is no guile.” I looked up the word “guile” and found this definition for the spiritual meaning of guile: “to be free of deceit, cunning, hypocrisy or dishonesty in thought or deed.” Ps 32:2 says “Blessed is the man to whom the Lord imputes no guilt, in whose spirit is no deceit (guile).” My partner struck me as just this sort of soul, which added another dimension to the story. The Lord knows her heart, and wants her to know she is blessed by the Lord for her pure spirit.

Praise God for this little prayer exercise that brought blessing to us both, and to others I have shared it with. How we desire to be seen, to be known, and to be called into deeper intimacy with Him! I’ll remember it whenever I see a white blossoming tree!

Thank you Lord, for your gift of the Holy Spirit which puts into our minds a word or image to bring blessing to another. Grant us this gift of the Spirit that we may be agents of Your love and mercy to our brothers and sisters, drawing us both into a deeper intimacy with You…

83) It is Well

Our parish hosted a recent Day of Reflection focused on the theme “It is Well.” The theme corresponded to the beautiful hymn, “It is well with my soul,” written by Horatio Spafford in 1873. I was especially blessed with Fr Wratkowski’s reflections about just what it means “to be well.”

He began with the story of the writing of the hymn, a tale of deep faith in God in the midst of tragedy. Horatio and Anna Spafford had experienced financial disaster after the Great Chicago fire, but were now able to plan a trip to Europe to visit family and friends, and to celebrate Christmas in Paris. Horatio had to wait to finish some necessary business, but bid Anna and their four daughters bon voyage and Godspeed on the French steamer SS Ville de Havre.
Off the coast of Newfoundland their vessel collided with an English ship, the Loch Earn, ripping a huge hole in the hull, and causing so much damage that their ship sank within 20 minutes. Fr Wratkowski spoke of how before the ship sank, Anna gathered her children to pray, seeking God’s help. She prayed not only to be spared, but “for the grace to endure whatever might come.”

What came was the tragic loss by drowning of all four of their daughters, with Anna alone surviving. She was rescued by a life boat, and ten days later arrived in Cardiff, Wales, where she sent a telegram home to Horatio with the simple message “Saved Alone.”

He took passage on a ship to join her as soon as he could, traveling the same sea route where his children had perished. The captain of the ship called him when they came to the very spot where his daughters had drowned, and it was there that Horatio looked not down at the sea, but up to Heaven where he trusted his loved ones to be, and the words of the beautiful hymn, “It is well with my soul,” began to live in his heart.

He arrived and joined his grieving wife, and also met with their close friend, evangelist Dwight Moody. In relating their story to him, they were able in faith to say, “It is well. God’s will be done.” This phrase remained in Horatio’s heart, and was the kernel of grace that produced the words of the hymn. There’s much more to the story, and well worth reading, as from this tragedy the Spafford family’s life bore great fruit in service of God’s people.

There’s a beautiful YouTube presentation, with the Mormon Tabernacle Choir singing the hymn, and a theatrical re-enactment of the story that includes “the rest of the story.”

There are so many hymns that we’ve come to know and love. How much more this one means to me now that I’ve heard the story behind it’s composition. I return again to one of my favorite Scriptures, Romans 8:28. “All things works together for good, for those who love God and are called according to His purpose.” Praise God for His Word, for HIs Promises, and for the grace to endure whatever may come, knowing that nothing is outside of His Providence.

Thank You Lord, for the beautiful witness of faith that has been handed down to us throughout the centuries, and inspires us to trust You in all circumstances. Help me to remain close to You always, and know that indeed, it is well with my soul…

****************

When peace, like a river, attendeth my way, When sorrows like sea billows roll; Whatever my lot, Thou hast taught me to say, It is well, it is well with my soul.
Refrain: It is well with my soul, It is well, it is well with my soul.
Though Satan should buffet, though trials should come, Let this blest assurance control, That Christ hath regarded my helpless estate, And hath shed His own blood for my soul.
My sin—oh, the bliss of this glorious thought!— My sin, not in part but the whole, Is nailed to the cross, and I bear it no more, Praise the Lord, praise the Lord, O my soul!
For me, be it Christ, be it Christ hence to live: If Jordan above me shall roll, No pang shall be mine, for in death as in life Thou wilt whisper Thy peace to my soul.
But, Lord, ’tis for Thee, for Thy coming we wait, The sky, not the grave, is our goal; Oh, trump of the angel! Oh, voice of the Lord! Blessed hope, blessed rest of my soul!
And Lord, haste the day when the faith shall be sight, The clouds be rolled back as a scroll; The trump shall resound, and the Lord shall descend, Even so, it is well with my soul.

82) Candles

I’m here on retreat at Christ the King Retreat House watching the candles burning in the chapel. So many candles, so many prayers being lifted up to the Lord! Each one representing someone’s need, or thanksgiving – each one seen and the prayer heard by the Lord. I believe He sees each person as they consider lighting that candle; He knows what’s on their heart, He knows the faith that is calling them to light a candle, and He’s ready ahead of time to answer that prayer – always in His perfect timing, and in His perfect provision. Not always in the way the candle lighter envisions it, but always in the way that is best for the intention. I thank God that He’s given me the faith to believe that, for I’ve lighted many candles in my life, and to know in my heart that each one was seen and received by the Lord is a great consolation to me.

Being raised Protestant, the candle lighting had not been a part of our family’s religious practices. I first became really aware of it when Bill and I made our first retreat at Holy Name Retreat House on Chambers Island. It was a spiritual turning point in our lives, and re-set our course to a more serious look at our faith and how we practiced it. We were facing bankruptcy and all that entails, and were so deeply blessed to hear the wise counsel of the retreat director, Fr Leon, advising Bill to let it go, as the loss of the business was killing all of us. Bill received this counsel, and the beginning of peace in his heart which he needed to begin again.

We were in the chapel of the retreat house, looking at all those candles burning, and we lit one – both in gratitude for this holy encounter, and in supplication for God’s help moving forward. And we took a candle home with us, to light when we felt called to come to the Lord for help.

That was when we lit it at first – just when something special was calling for prayer. It might be a birthday celebration, or a need for healing, or safe travel, or…. As time went on, we lit it more and more, until it became a perpetual light near our little Mary space, with a statue of the Blessed Mother and a flower in her honor. This holy practice has become a part of my devotional life ever since, and it’s been 45 years since we lit that first candle.

When I go to the cabin, I light the candle on the fireplace and keep it burning til we go home, asking God to bless our family time there. Prayers for safety, for the healing of any strained relationships, for traveling mercies, for any family member in most need of help, in thanksgiving for Gma & Gpa Fellman who made the place possible! So many petitions lifted up to the Lord, and He hears each one!

At home now in my office room, the candle is lit when I get up in the morning, and I usually blow it out at night, to make the candles last longer. The Lord knows that the candle is lit in my heart 24/7, with the flame of love from the Holy Spirit keeping me warm and connected to God’s burning love for His people. I thank God for the gift of candle light, and for the greater gift of “His Light shining in the darkness, and the darkness has not overcome it.” (John 1:5). And it never will!

Lord God, thank you for sending Your Son Jesus as the Light of the world! Thank you for the gift of candles, the little lights we can ignite to remind us of Your great love and provision in the ups and downs of our lives. May we always keep a candle lit in our hearts, trusting in Your perfect care and mercy for us and for all we hold in our hearts…

80) Praying for the Dead

November is a month dedicated to prayer for the dead, with visits to a cemetery on my “to do” list. I’m grateful for the wisdom of the Church to teach me about this, with the reality of communion with the holy souls awaiting our prayers to speed them on the way to purification and union with the Trinity. Knowing that they in turn are praying for us, for me, is a source of comfort and deep gratitude as I acknowledge the truth of the communion of the saints! The veil is often so very thin, and I’m especially aware of this amidst the gravestones.

I’ve always loved cemeteries! This was especially true during the covid isolation days. We couldn’t congregate indoors, and the parks and public spots available for social distancing were often crowded. I desired more space, and found the cemeteries to be the perfect answer – quiet, few people around, and the awareness of being on holy ground with the saints 🙂 I’ll stop and read some of the epithets, wondering what their life on earth was like, and what it’s like to be united now with those who have gone before them. Homecoming celebrations in Heaven are the best kind!

Again and again I’ve been reminded of the great value of “remembering death,” memento mori. This last week our Marian Servant community was blessed with a Day of Reflection led by Fr Daniel Klimek, who confirmed this beautifully as he spoke of the value of meditating on Christ’s Passion, uniting our sufferings with His on the Cross. This leads so naturally to the reality of our own death, and desiring the help of the saints to live this life well and so be united with Christ in Eternity.

I’m headed out soon to pray in the cemetery at our parish church, and one day this week I’ll join a friend to pray by her husband’s grave. Mentally I’ll spend some time visiting the family graves back in my hometown, praying for the repose of their souls, and seeking their intercession for family and friends who don’t yet know the Lord, His Love and care for them.

Lord God, may I be ever mindful of the shortness of this earthly life, grateful for this gift of life, especially eternal life with You! May my prayers help to speed holy souls on their journey to you, even as they offer prayers for us here and now. “Eternal rest grant unto them O Lord, and may perpetual light shine upon them. May their souls and the souls of all the faithful departed, through the mercy of God, rest in peace. Amen.”

79) Keep Holy the Sabbath

Remember the Sabbath, to keep it holy…. I’ve been reminded often lately of the commandment to keep holy the Sabbath. Not just a suggestion, or a good thought, but a commandment of God Almighty!

I’m home alone most of today, with those words echoing in my thoughts as I go about various low key activities. Blessed of course to begin the day spending some quiet time in my bedroom, praying my daily morning offering prayers, followed by holy Mass with my daughter and the little ones, always an adventure! Of course, donuts after Mass, and meeting new parishioners was another good part of our Church time 🙂

The words from the homily stuck with me today – the absolute necessity of daily prayer time! As the rest of the family was headed out for various adventures, I took out my journal and asked, what next?

I set my timer for 30 minutes and savored the words from tomorrow’s Gospel of Luke: “whoever receives this child in my name receives me, and the one who receives me receives the one who sent me.” Repeating these words over and over, my desire to receive the Father was strengthened. I want to welcome Him into my heart, into our home, into every aspect of our lives.

Keeping these words close to my heart, I made a phone call to my sister-in-law to plan a visit, a text to secure an overnight bed, took a walk outdoors on this beautiful day and prayed the Divine Mercy chaplet, followed by a nap!

Refreshed in body and spirit now, some time was spent on small household tasks, to help make life a little easier for this busy little family. Prepping some fruit as I listened to Christian music, sweeping up a bit around the front entrance with the music still on my phone in my back pocket, picking up a few of the odds and ends that are wanting to find a home 🙂 “Cleanliness is next to godliness” is a phrase I’ve heard all my life, and whenever I manage to tidy up a spot or create more order, I know it’s pleasing to God and helps us all on our path to holiness 🙂

It’s hot out today, so I sat down with a cool drink and did a little spiritual reading. Today was Renewal Ministries monthly newsletter about their mission to Uganda, and was truly inspiring and encouraging to hear of the faith of the people there. Ralph Martin’s sense that the “hour” of the church in Africa has arrived spoke to my heart, and reminded me of the blessings of our visit to Zimbabwe, where we visited our friends who were doing medical missionary work there. It also reminded me of my great niece’s mission work in Egypt now, and to pray for her and their family as they discern the next step hearing God’s call for a new location. This prompted me to spend a little more time lifting certain recent intentions to the Lord, knowing He hears and answers each one as only He truly knows best.

I was interrupted in thought by a text from our daughter in Canada – we had a phone date on the calendar for this afternoon, and she was checking to see if the timing was good! I had forgotten! But God hadn’t, and His timing was perfect! We had a short chat, and were blessed to remember the gift of growing up in our little family in the early years when we had no money and our recreation was focused on simple outdoor adventures: going to the park, walking in the woods, spotting glow in the dark mushrooms! We each spoke words of appreciation and encouragement, and especially gratitude for each other 🙂

Well, I just hung up and felt the next thing to do was to jot down these thoughts about keeping the Sabbath holy. So here I am, with peace in my heart and deep gratitude for the gift of a day to “be still, and know that You are God.” Indeed, Your gift of a Sabbath rest is essential to live a holy life that will bring blessing and healing to this fast-paced society we live in. May I keep the remainder of this day as a Day of the Lord, for His praise and Glory!

Thank you Lord, for Your commandment to keep holy the Sabbath. How much we need this time to slow down, connect with friends and family, and enjoy the beauty of Your creation! To gather for worship and prayer, receive Your Word, and seek to live it each day in gratitude for life itself, and all the blessings you provide. Be with me now as I listen and follow Your lead to whatever You desire of me next…

PS – “next” included playing in the sandbox with my grandson and helping with apple peeling and dinner dishes, all wrapped up in evening prayer. I feel like this is what is looks like for me to keep holy the Sabbath 🙂 Thank You Lord!

78) Stay Home

At the National Eucharistic Congress, I was blessed with an image of the Lord Jesus, sitting in the armchair in my bedroom and waiting there for me at home. Home – the place where I’m with Jesus; safe, comforted, protected, at peace :). I saw myself as a little girl, entering the room, coming to sit on His lap, and He wrapped us up in the afghan that had been crocheted by my mom, with a prayer for each stitch. What a precious place to be, warm and cozy, snuggled close to His Heart!

Sharing this image and story with my spiritual director, I mentioned that a word that has been reappearing in my journals has been, “Stay Home!” The temptation to run off to various spiritual opportunities has not always been in balance with my duties and responsibilities as a wife and mother. I’ve been seeking to come to the right equilibrium as this word continues to show up!

As our session continued, more thoughts of Home began coming to mind, in different variations. I’ve moved a fair amount in the last ten years, as I’ve cared for my Mom in her last years, experienced divorce, and moved from our house to a house of my own, then to a small apartment, a more permanent apartment, and now to two bedrooms in my daughter’s house. In the process of these later moves I’ve recognized that Home for me is being close to a Tabernacle, where Jesus is always present and waiting for me.

The last several moves brought me to a new geographical place, away from friends and Church community I had known for more than 40 years. These moves have brought me to two new faith communities, starting all over again in meeting fellow parishioners. Yet this sense of Home, always having an Adoration chapel and daily Mass as an anchor have made the transitions quite smooth. I’ve been so grateful for the generous hospitality offered in these parishes to newcomers like me.

The Girl Scout song I learned years ago comes to mind here: “Make new friends, but keep the old; one is silver, but the other Gold.” The Gold is my friendship with Jesus, and to be with Him is always a coming Home.

Today I’m at our family cabin the the North Woods, a place that has always been Home for me. My parents bought it in 1946, when I was just one year old, and it’s been the place of family connecting and a stable peaceful retreat location as I’ve made all the many geographical moves in my lifetime. From city to city, state to state, house to apartment, this spot has always been there, always a coming Home destination.

As I sit here at the family table, I see the names of our family members which had been etched on the chairs around the table. I’m surrounded by the communion of saints, praying for me and calling me to join them in the eternal Home, in Heaven!

Another level of Home began to surface in reflection, that being the reality that Home is in my very own heart, where Jesus resides always. In the wake of the Congress, with the Eucharistic Pilgrimages, I came to recognize that each one of us is actually a Eucharistic Procession, as we carry Jesus with us wherever we go! I can envision Christians around the world, each with the Light of Christ within them, radiating that Light and bringing it’s Glow into the darkness of this suffering world.

“Home is where the Heart is,” is a saying that’s often been shared. If indeed Jesus lives in my heart, as His Word proclaims, I’m always at Home, no matter the time or location. I can indeed stay home, for Home is in my Heart! May I continue to live in that awareness of Jesus in my heart, to “stay Home” through the Immaculate Heart of Mary, the Sacred Heart of Jesus, and Home to the Heart of the Father in Heaven!

Lord God, thank you for all the images and remembrances of Home. Thank You for connecting the dots between Home and Heart, between Home here and Home in Heaven. Thank you for calling us to live in communion with Your Heart, present within us, and to bring the Love of Your Heart to all we meet, to stay in the intimacy of Home with You…

77) Call to Holiness

A friend was sharing about a book she had recently read and enjoyed, which sounded like a nice easy read for the summer. I ordered a copy, expecting to relax and enter into its narrative, touching on memories that resonated with my own growing up years in the country. The book also spoke of the author’s first romance, experienced in an era of more grace and restraint than our modern culture demonstrates. As I read of the budding romance that led to marriage, I was struck by the purity of the courtship, and surprised by how my heart was being moved, to the point that tears began to flow freely.

I’m not one to cry often, and rarely in the presence of other people, so the intimacy of entering into this story proved to be a place where I was more open to God’s touch. For indeed He was touching my heart, and I didn’t understand why. When I casually mentioned my crying experience to my daughters, they asked me the “why” question, and I didn’t elaborate for two reasons. One (1), I knew I would begin to cry again (I could feel it!), and Two (2), I didn’t know the answer.

A classic rule of a spiritual direction session is to bring forward the thing you least want to talk about. So, obedient to the model, I started to relate this experience to my director, and sure enough, there were the tears again, waiting to come forth! She gave me some space, and then named the word that solved the “why.” It was “Purity.” The beauty of witnessing

Purity, and how it blessed the people who were embracing it in their relationship, was a grace of God. A gift, that He wanted me to recognize and receive.

As I thought about this reality, another conversation confirmed it for me. I was briefly mentioning being surprised by tears as I read a book, without going into any detail or speaking of purity. My friend immediately connected with my experience, as he spoke of also being surprised by tears recently. He was googling “stuff” and came across a clip of four little girls singing the national anthem at a football game in Texas. He clarified that he was not drawn to any of those details; little girls, Texas, football or the national anthem. What touched his heart, as it had touched mine, was the purity, the beauty, of the singing. Their voices were in perfect sync with one another, and the arrangement had some additional harmony that was excellent. He found himself crying, it was so pure, and I would add, holy.

Vatican II has called all the baptized to a Universal Call to Holiness. I’m recognizing in this call how much Purity, a manifestation of Beauty, is central to holiness. I googled Truth, Beauty and Goodness and came up with these thoughts: “Truth, Beauty and Goodness are considered to be transcendentals, or eternal attributes of being that are present in all things created by God… God is the source of these attributes, and possesses them in their ultimate perfection… Humans, since they are made in the image and likeness of God, not only have the attributes as a reflection of Him, but are also aware of these transcendentals and are drawn to them because the desire to seek God out is written in the human heart.” (From http://www.corpuschristiphx.org, June 2021)

These words brought great consolation to my heart, as my friend who was moved by the purity / Beauty of the little girls’ singing is presently at odds with God and outwardly resistant to His Love. I rejoice to know that his response to these attributes corresponds to the desire to seek God that is written in his heart! I’ve known and believe that God has His Hand on him, and this series of events has confirmed that for me, praise God!

Thank You Lord, for the gift of tears experienced and shared which has opened another window to Your Goodness. Thank you for Your attribute of Beauty, manifest in purity that lifts up the call to Holiness. Thank You for again weaving experiences and events together in unexpected and surprising ways to reassure me of Your love and care for those I hold in my heart. May I continue to trust in Your Divine Providence as You make Your Goodness manifest to eyes that are open…

70) In Persona Christi

70) In Persona Christi 6/23/24

The Church teaches that our priests are “in persona Christi,” in the very person of Christ. This has come home to me in a way that reinforces the reality of God’s personal knowledge and love for little me; He recognizes and knows me!

It’s always a delight when I meet someone I haven’t seen for a while and their face lights up as we recognize each other! It’s obvious that they remember me, and that they’re happy to see me 🙂 (Me too!) Gathering for family celebrations, meeting at conferences, and just bumping into people at the grocery store are all opportunities the Lord provides to bring His children together as family.

The ones that have really spoken to my heart are when a holy priest (or even a bishop!) recognizes little me, and their look conveys a warm welcome. There are so very many people that call for the attention of our pastors, I often marvel that they are able to keep us all straight! As I enter my late 70’s, I’m that much more aware of seeing people that look familiar, and searching my memory files to identify how we’re connected 🙂 When the name and relationship come in to focus, it’s a real gift!

As the Lord has been reminding me again and again, He really knows ME, and He provides circumstances and happy surprises to confirm that in my heart 🙂 I think of going to Mass in a small town far from home, and as I approached the pastor to receive Jesus, he recognized me, and said my name, Ann! He had prepared me for entrance into the Catholic Church 40 years ago, and I hadn’t seem him in a long time. In my spirit, I heard Jesus through this good priest call my name, and smile at me.

I remember a special Bishop remembering my name as we headed on the Quo Vadis boat to Holy Name Retreat House at Chambers Island; we hadn’t seen each other in several years, but he remembered me, and called me by name!

Going to Mass in another small town away from home, there was my spiritual director as the celerbrant – he knows me well, but was surprised to see me there, and his happy and inviting greeting came to me as straight from Jesus; this priest was in persona Christi.

The most recent was at the a very large Mass with the Bishop presiding. My friends, who were ahead of me in the communion line, switched to the Bishop’s line, and I followed them. When he raised the Host, speaking those precious words, “the Body of Christ,” his eyes met mine, and lit up enough for me to know that he too recognized me, remembered me, and that it was a happy memory for him! Again, we hadn’t seen each other in several years, but had some written correspondence that had been a blessing for us both, and had created that bond of friendship that is centered on Christ. Once again I was reminded, “God Himself knows you, He remembers you, and He’s delighted to bless you again with a gift that would be meaningful only to you. He loves YOU!” (ME!!!). My heart sings with gratitude to the Good God Who can never be outdone in His generous love for His little children!

Lord God, how grateful I am for the repeated reminders of Your personal intimate love for me; that You know me, remember me, and delight in surprising me with this gift, offered especially through Your holy priests, “in persona Christi!” May You speak to each of their hearts so personally also, as they bring Your love and mercy to Your children…

68) Poem – Come Holy Spirit!

Easter season

Extending to Pentecost

Basking in the Resurrection

Waiting for the Spirit

I’ve come back to Galilee

Here at the cabin

In the Upper Room

Gazing out on the Lake

The water’s really high

Wind is picking up

Waves washing on the shoreline

Whitecaps out on the Lake

Come Holy Spirit!

Fill me anew!

Baptize me again

Each and every day

Fresh in filling of Your Spirit

I can’t really Live without it

Your Life within me

Making all things New

National Renewal

Calling for a Nine Year Novena!

Pentecost 2033

Calling every Christian

Pray for Your Mercy

Pray for Your Peace

Only You can save us

From the disorder in our lives

Re-order us to Your Love

Receive It and give It back

To everyone we encounter

All beloved of You

Wind is blowing stronger

Trees bending and waving

Bowing to Your Power

Proclaiming Your Praises!

Thank You Lord, Praise You!

Preparing our hearts

Preparing for Your coming

Today, and every day

Preparing our Nation

Turning hearts back to You

Source of All we long for

Your peace within our hearts

“Acquire interior peace

And many will find salvation

Near you”

St Seraphim of Sarov

Come Holy Spirit

Fill me With Your Peace

How much our broken world needs You

Fill me afresh today!

Peace as prelude to Union

Union with the Holy God

You made us to be one with You

One with Holy Trinity!

67) Self-reliance or Surrender

Self-reliance, or Surrender?

I’m watching my grandchildren as they’re learning how to do things for themselves, growing in confidence as they manage simple tasks like drinking from a cup and using eating utensils. Their achievements are met with encouragement and praise with each new skill mastered. Mom and Dad, Grandma and Grandpa, all smile and applaud as the little ones soak in the love that is being showered upon them, helping them to risk trying the next challenge presented. “Good job, Honey!” “Way to go, Buddy!” And as the kids are becoming more and more articulate, we hear “I did it!,” accompanied by a well deserved smile and self-satisfaction.

In the world of faith my focus has become self-surrender, as the Word “without Me, you can do nothing,” (John 15:5) echoes often in my thoughts. I’m wondering how this transition takes place, and thinking it needs to begin right at the start. Helping the little ones know that everything good comes from the Creator, from the Good God Who loves them and gives them the ability to do anything. Knowing that He created us to learn and to grow, to use the gifts He’s given us, and that indeed all is gift from Him. And to know too how pleased He is with their abilities and progress, that He too is cheering them on, and whispering “God job, My beloved daughter!” And “Way to go, beloved child of My Heart!” My own heart desires to hear them respond, “See what God has helped me to do!” And to know in their hearts that He is their constant help, that their accomplishments are pleasing to Him, and that He is always looking at them with love and encouragement.

I recently heard Debbie Herbeck share how she encouraged her daughters, beginning at age 3, to look in the mirror each morning and repeat, “I am a beloved daughter of God.” To teach them right from the start that they have been created by a Good God, Who loves them unconditionally, and will help them do all that they ever need to do, so they may become all they have been created to be.

One of the primary obstacles to union with God is said to be “self-reliance.” How we need to teach the little ones the necessary skills to master as they grow, within the framework of God’s provision. As they grow, to help them to grasp the gift of the Holy Spirit Who enables them to function beyond their natural abilities, and accomplish “exceedingly abundantly beyond all we ask or imagine,” (Eph 3:20), all for the Glory of God!

It seems it goes back to recognizing that they are not doing anything alone, but always with the help of the Good God who loves them. As I’m becoming more aware of my own littleness, of my own nothingness, perhaps this reflection is for me. I’m that little child, weak and helpless, but empowered by the very Holy Spirit Who raised Jesus from the tomb!

“If the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead is living in you, he who raised Christ from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies because of his Spirit who lives in you. (Rom 8:11) Praise God Who calls me to be always God-reliant and not self-reliant!

Lord God, thank you for reminding me of Your ever-present help and strength to do all You ask of me, as I watch our grandchildren learning new skills. May we all know that indeed nothing is possible without You, not even the next breath we take, that we may live in the attitude of gratitude for all that you enable us to do and be, for Your praise and Glory…