42) Come Holy Spirit!

Come Holy Spirit!

       On a beautiful spring day, with blue skies, sunshine and no breezes, our little group of ladies had gathered to pray and plan for an up-coming retreat at our parish.  We were meeting outside on a patio at one of the ladies’ houses, and enjoying the beauty and peace of the natural surroundings.  

      Our planning included concerns about the resistance our church leadership had with our retreat, and we were seeking a good way to cooperate with authority, and have the retreat take place.  We did our planning, and were wrapping it up with prayer, praying especially for the pastor, that he might be blessed and find peace in his heart as he led our parish.

      Gratefully, our prayers weren’t to “change him,” or to pray that he would do what we wanted him to do – they were prayers being prayed in one accord for his well being and to receive God’s blessings.  The unity we felt was tangible, as we prayed spontaneously for the retreat, and for our pastor.

      What I will never forget is what happened as we were closing our prayers!  Although the air had been very still, suddenly the sheets on the clothesline began to flap loudly, and a strong wind came up and swirled the leaves that were scattered around the patio.  It was really loud, and seemed to come out of nowhere!  This lasted for several minutes, and then all was again peaceful and calm, with not a cloud to be seen in the sky.

     The husband of the house where we were had been working a little distance away in the family garden; he stopped working and came up to us, asking in surprise, “what was That?!”  We were all asking the same question 🙂

     What came to us was a sense of God’s pleasure in our Unity of heart and in our sincere prayers for our pastor.   “How good and pleasant it is when brothers (and sisters) live together in unity! It is like precious oil poured n the head, running down the beard, running down Aaron’s beard, down upon the collar of his robes.” (Ps 133:1) The Lord takes delight in HIs children when they come together in Unity, with the intentions of their hearts in line with the desires of God’s own heart – to extend blessings and peace, even to those with whom we have differences.

      We all were blessed to feel that Wind, and to recognize in it God’s Holy Spirit, affirming our prayer with a loud exclamation point!  Come Holy Spirit of Unity, bind our hearts together and renew the face of the earth!  How we need You, especially in our culture today with increasing divisions.  Come Holy Spirit, Come!

41) Thank you, Mom

blue purple clouds

shafts of rose

still waters

quiet time

only the clock ticking

inner peace

stopping time

no more running

slowing down time

different paces 

different places

sifting through

the stuff of living

collected over

many many years

a well worn Bible

letter inserts

from Aunt Fanny

and from Beth 

words of comfort

Scripture verses

Your Word Lord

bringing grace

sitting here

in mom’s chair now

winding down

. thinking of you, mom

thanking you

so many gifts given

love without strings

forgiveness and patience

bedtime prayers

come to mind now 

“I am so blessed

I am so blessed”

“thank You Lord

for my father

who taught me You

are always near”

“thank You Lord

for my good husband

loving father

son and friend”

“thank You Lord

for gift of family

always bringing

someone to help me”

“and the Lord’s prayer

that Jesus gave us

it says it all

can ask for no more”

thank You Lord

for mom’s life of gratitude

thank You Lord

You store my memories

each day I pray

take all my memory

that I may forget

what’s best forgotten

and remember

all that draws me

nearer Lord

to You to You

thank You Lord

that You forgive me

and those You receive

forgive me too

praise the God

Who lives in my heart

Who gave me life

Who loves me still

praise You Lord

You hold my mother

in Your arms

so very gently

praise You Lord

I live to praise You

how could I not

and yet survive?

quiet hours

inner stillness

bringing time

to remember Love

thank You Lord

You give me time

space to process

life worth living

40) poem – Take 5 minutes

4/19/91

Take five minutes

To purge the bad taste that makes my stomach turn 

And threatens to make me cry.

And I seldom do that.

Perhaps it would be easier if I were a frequent crier,

But I’m not.

A pain I can’t expel by unloading on my friends,

Not even my letter friends,

For to print it is to acknowledge it, and I keep wanting it to go away.

I’m blowing it out of proportion…

It isn’t really true…

It hasn’t been sealed…

So I can ignore it, and perhaps

It will vanish.

But it gnaws at the back of my mind

And I keep seeking it out,

Looking for clues to confirm or deny –

Wanting to confront and address it, 

Yet afraid if I do that will make it real.

So far it still lingers in the hazy world of the bad dream,

Not yet a nightmare, but close.

So I tuck it away again, and plunge in to activity 

To think of other things,

And wonder – and wonder…

And push back the smothering images,

And the tears come, and my throat grows tight,

And the silent choking muffled sobs seize me for a moment only.

Enough.  My five minutes are expired,

Enough time to expel a little of the poison

That clouds my vision, and renders me useless.

Think instead of Heidi, and Jeff, and Billy,

And wallow in self-pity no longer.

Life continues, in all its varied patterns –

Only time will reveal the truth I seek to uncover,

A truth that perhaps isn’t even yet fully formed.

Let time continue and use well these moments here and now –

They won’t linger and wait for me.

39) poem – the Breaking of Bread

the breaking of Bread               

     Holy Eucharist

           True Presence

     feeding our souls

Body and Blood

     Soul and Divinity

           Your Life poured out

     for the life of the world

time in Your Presence

     to open our minds

          understand Scripture

     all written of You

here I am, Lord

      here in Your Presence

            Eucharistic Adoration

      the simple white Host

received You this morning

      St. Martin’s communion

           St Pius tonight

      Fr. John Mass

You live in me, Lord

     here in my heart

          doors flung wide open

     torn off their hinges

the word You gave Karen

      there are no doors

            and You’re waiting for her, Lord

      waiting for… what?

prayer of relinquishment

      total surrender

            the harder we try

      the more distant it gets

time to stop trying

     to relax and to trust

          receiving Your Love

     healing balm floods my soul

“are not our hearts, Lord

      burning within us

           are not our hearts

      lighted with Fire…”

the disciples felt exiled

      leaving Jerusalem

            You call them to return

      wait in the Upper Room

where is my Upper Room, Lord?

      where do I wait for You?

           at the foot of the Cross

      covered with Your Blood

the need to return

      to leave the Risen Christ

            kneel below the crucifix

      uniting my heart to Yours

it’s only the grace of Pentecost

      that allows me to

           feel my pain

      and unite it then with Yours

without the Holy Spirit

      I’d be swallowed up

            in grief

      crushed and in despair

I need the whole Story, Lord

     can’t skip any parts

           to live abundant life

      without fear…    only Love

Joy exploding

      at the breaking of the Bread

            at the opening of eyes

      awakening of hearts

12:35                                                        

      pierce my heart, Lord                              

            that graces may flow                               

      bringing Your healing Love                      

thank You Lord, praise You

the road to Emmaus

walking with others

seeking Your will…..

 

38) Poem – Chosen Vessel

chosen vessel                    

     Mary’s womb

           God’s Word spoken

     “I want you”

here I am, Lord

      Divine Mercy Chapel

          after Mass at St Pius

      Fr. Tom homily

moment of conception

      how must it have felt?

            Divine spark within her

      flooded with Joy

Conchita’s great gift

     to be one with Mary

           spiritual incarnation

      conception of Love

You made Yourself known, Lord

     in the breaking of Bread

          another epiphany

     celebration of grace

my own revelation, Lord

     Stevie’s class Mass

          and it occurred to me

     to act as if it’s all true

If I truly believe

     You’re Alive in this Host

          Lord God Almighty

      in this small piece of Bread

if I believe this is True

      my life must be changed

            every thought   every act

      centered on Eucharist

believing You come to me

      me, whom You’ve called

            chosen to receive You

      our hearts intertwined

God of the Universe

      Creator     Redeemer

            how dare I believe

      You’ve chosen and called me

I who am nothing

     the blink of an eye

          a puff of soft smoke

      a drop in the sea

from the deep to a mountaintop

     heart racing with joy

          want to tell the whole world

     it’s all true – He’s Alive!

stay with me, Lord

      my heart aches to receive You

          how could I live

      without knowledge of You?

so here I am, Lord

     here in the chapel

          I’ll kneel for a while

     before I must leave

enter my heart, Lord

      please be at home there

            I’ve prepared it for You

      as best I know how

swept it and cleaned it

      emptied the closets

            scrubbed it and shined it

      did all I know how

come Lord, live in me

      my time’s running out

            is it my 11th hour?

      may I spend it with You…

37) Poem – Watch and Wait

watch and wait                              

      watch and wait

           nothing else I can do

      but watch and wait

as the drama unfolds

      this seems the last chance

           You could escape certain death

      the clock is ticking

the scourging is ordered

       before crucifixion

             Pilate washes his hands

       to be free of Your blood

but doesn’t he know

      it’s Your blood which could save him?

            why is he blind

      to the Fount of salvation?

would I be blind too

      were I there in the crowd?

             would I scream “Crucify!”

      would I care if You died?

it’s only Your own heart

      which You’ve given to me

            that sets me apart

      from myself that could kill

it’s only Your grace

      that separates me

            from the cruelty of man

      that inflicts suffering and pain

it’s only Your grace

      a fine thin thread

            the life line that keeps

      me from falling into sin

O Lord, may I never

      abandon You again

            may I stay with You Lord

      world without end

            Amen…     Amen…

36) Nothing Is Impossible for God ~ Luke 1:37

     The combination for the Adoration Chapel is 1:37.  What comes to my mind here is Luke 1:37 ~ nothing is impossible for God!  I’ve experienced His actions which are really impossible in the natural realm, but which actually happened, and which have strengthened my faith and trust in His promises.  As we come to celebrate the feast of St Dismas on March 25, the following experience comes to mind…

      My friend Joan is a holy woman who has had a hard life living as a Native American on a reservation.  She shared this story in her own words… “One of the people I offer my pain for is my son, Bruce, who is in prison.  Don’t think God doesn’t listen to your thoughts, ‘cause He does!  I was wondering which Saint to  pray to for Bruce.  A few days later as I was lying in bed with my Bible, my prayer book, my Saints book, and my rosary, I picked up the Saint book to read, and flipping through the pages I ran across Saint Dismas.  He’s the Patron Saint of prisoners, and is the good thief who was crucified with Jesus, and who Jesus told, “Today you will be with Me in Paradise.”  

    

The first thought I had was, “Why had I never noticed you before in my Saints book?”  The next morning when I got up I wanted to read about St. Dismas some more, but I couldn’t find him anywhere in the book.  I had just read about him the night before, and now he wasn’t there.  I looked through the book three times, but he just wasn’t in it.  I don’t know how that happened, but I believe God knew my thoughts and introduced me to this Saint to pray for Bruce.”

     I always am amazed as I recall this story, along with an increased desire to enlist the help of the Saints as I pray for others. The communion of Saints is real, and we do well to seek their intercession ~

     Lord God, thank You for answering our prayers, often in totally unexpected ways.  Thank You for the communion of Saints, and for connecting us to them in our times of need.  Thank You too for reminding us that You are indeed God beyond Time and Space, truly a God of the impossible ~ may we expand our expectations and rejoice in Your answers!

35) Amazing Grace

In meditating on several passages in Acts all referring to God’s grace, an experience recounted in Hannah Whital Smith’s book, THE CHRISTIAN’S SECRET OF A HAPPY LIFE, came to my mind. She recounted how a person had come to her full of anxiety and fear. This person begged God to show her whether He really was in everything or not.

God answered her prayer with a vision ~ she saw herself surrounded by a bright circle of Light, from which a Voice came, proclaiming, “This is the Presence of God! This is the Presence of God!” Through the circle she could see all the happenings of the world, the sorrows and pain, tragedies and sin, but not one of them could pass through the circle, except as the Presence divided to let the evil through. She saw herself in a state of perfect calm, undisturbed by whatever passed before her eyes. Even petty annoyances which had previously upset her no longer were able to shake this inner peace. She came to understand that all things were either sent or permitted by the providence of God, and by living in His presence He could keep her heart at peace in the midst of every circumstance.

Merlin’s Carother’s books on the Power of Praise come to mind here, as by example after example he shows how living in a trusting relationship with God, praising Him in All circumstances, brings that inner peace we desire to live the happy Christian life. Romans 8:28 becomes foundational to this reality: “All things work for good, for those who love God, who are called according to His purpose.” He has called us; we love Him; we desire to cooperate with the purpose He has set forth for us!

Lord God, may I remain in the awareness of being surrounded by Your Shield of Grace, in Your presence! May I believe in my heart that truly everything works for good for those who love You, and may I be one of those who live this truth, to be a credible witness of faith in You, evidenced by Your peace reigning in my heart…

Fifth Glorious Mystery – the Coronation of Mary as Queen of Heaven

On December 8, 2010, Bishop David Ricken of the Diocese of Green Bay celebrated Mass at the Shrine of Our Lady of Good Help in Champion WI, and declared the appearance of Mary to Sr. Adele Brise in this very spot in 1859 to be worthy of belief.  My friend Mary Ann, a third order Carmelite, had been offered a seat , along with a  guest, to attend the Mass, and she invited lucky (blessed) me 🙂  Neither of us knew that Bp Ricken was going to make the announcement that day – we just thought it would be a blessing to celebrate the Feast of the Immaculate Conception at the Shrine with the Bishop, which indeed it would be apart from anything else.  To actually be there when the pronouncement was made was truly a blessing – I’m so grateful to Mary Ann for inviting me!

     When Adele had asked the beautiful Lady who she was, Mary identified herself as the Queen of Heaven who prays for the conversion of sinners.  

      I had been to the Shrine a few times prior to the elevation of its status, but now Mary Ann and I both decided what a blessing it would be to volunteer there and be able to go more often, helping visitors on their pilgrimages.  We’ve been doing that for the last few years, and it’s always a grace-filled experience.  The Shrine is another oasis of peace, and Mary’s presence is sometimes  tangible.

      I’ve been blessed to make pilgrimages to Medjugorje, and to Our Lady of Guadalupe in LaCrosse, WI and in Mexico City.  More and more I recognize this life as a perpetual pilgrimage to Heaven, with each day offering the opportunity to journey both inward and outward seeking a deeper relationship with the Lord.  Mary’s help along the way is that of a beautiful companion and gentle mother.  

As I’ve been able to make these pilgrimages, it’s become apparent that heaven is not far away, but rather more often encountered in unexpected familiar surroundings.  Each day opens the possibility of meeting the Lord and receiving His blessing and grace – life has become an adventure filled with good surprises!

 Lord God, thank You for all the times throughout history when You have appeared to simple people, often through Your Blessed Mother, bringing messages of hope and mercy.  May we be open to receive these graces in our everyday duties and interactions  with others ~

Fourth Glorious Mystery – the Assumption of Mary

When I meditate on the mystery of the Assumption, I’m reminded of an experience as a hospice volunteer that’s been a blessing in my life.  I was spending time with a lovely elderly lady who was dying of cancer, providing respite care so her husband could have time to run some errands.  She looked very beautiful, despite her sickness, with a radiance about her that testified to her deep faith.  She usually was sleeping or resting while I stayed with her, and it was the story a nurses aide related to me that I remember.

       The aide would help to give her a bath and help with personal cares, so she was often awake to interact with this aide.  As she was nearing death and that time when a person is living both in this world and beginning to enter the next, the aide was asking her about her life and what she had experienced in all those years.  The lady spoke about a dream she had had to run a day care center and take care of little ones, but that  dream had never materialized. The aide suggested that in heaven she could have a beautiful day care for all the children there, and the lady smiled at her and said yes, and she would take care of the aide’s three little ones who were in heaven.

     The aide was taken aback, and asked how could she know that she had lost three babies to miscarriages – she had never told her about that.  But the lady knew – she was so close to the other side that she knew, and the smile on her face at the happy thought of caring for them affirmed that inner knowing.

      Mary our Mother was assumed body and soul into heaven; this is our faith, and the witness of a kind and gentle soul who was about to go to meet her has reassured me of the truth of this belief…

     Lord God, thank You for the gift of faith that beckons me to the eternal life promised in the Scriptures.  May the knowledge of Mary’s entrance to heaven console and encourage us as we mourn the loss of those we have loved here on earth ~