Month: September 2024

78) Stay Home

At the National Eucharistic Congress, I was blessed with an image of the Lord Jesus, sitting in the armchair in my bedroom and waiting there for me at home.  Home – the place where I’m with Jesus; safe, comforted, protected, at peace :). I saw myself as a little girl, entering the room, coming to sit on His lap, and He wrapped us up in the afghan that had been crocheted by my mom, with a prayer for each stitch.  What a precious place to be, warm and cozy, snuggled close to His Heart! 

     Sharing this image and story with my spiritual director, I mentioned that a word that has been reappearing in my journals has been, “Stay Home!”  The temptation to run off to various spiritual opportunities has not always been in balance with my duties and responsibilities as a wife and mother. I’ve been seeking to come to the right equilibrium as this word continues to show up!

     As our session continued, more thoughts of Home began coming to mind, in different variations.  I’ve moved a fair amount in the last ten years, as I’ve cared for my Mom in her last years, experienced divorce, and moved from our house to a house of my own, then to a small apartment, a more permanent apartment, and now to two bedrooms in my daughter’s house.  In the process of these later moves I’ve recognized that Home for me is being close to a Tabernacle, where Jesus is always present and waiting for me.

     The last several moves brought me to a new geographical place, away from friends and Church community I had known for more than 40 years.  These moves have brought me to two new faith communities, starting all over again in meeting fellow parishioners.  Yet this sense of Home, always having an Adoration chapel and daily Mass as an anchor have made the transitions quite smooth.  I’ve been so grateful for the generous hospitality offered in these parishes to newcomers like me.   

     The Girl Scout song I learned years ago comes to mind here: “Make new friends, but keep the old; one is silver, but the other Gold.”  The Gold is my friendship with Jesus, and to be with Him is always a coming Home.

     Today I’m at our family cabin the the North Woods, a place that has always been Home for me.  My parents bought it in 1946, when I was just one year old, and it’s been the place of family connecting and a stable peaceful retreat location as I’ve made all the many geographical moves in my lifetime.  From city to city, state to state, house to apartment, this spot has always been there, always a coming Home destination. 

      As I sit here at the family table, I see the names of our family members which had been etched on the chairs around the table.  I’m surrounded by the communion of saints, praying for me and calling me to join them in the eternal Home, in Heaven!   

     Another level of Home began to surface in reflection, that being the reality that Home is in my very own heart, where Jesus resides always.  In the wake of the Congress, with the Eucharistic Pilgrimages, I came to recognize that each one of us is actually a Eucharistic Procession, as we carry Jesus with us wherever we go!  I can envision Christians around the world, each with the Light of Christ within them, radiating that Light and bringing it’s Glow into the darkness of this suffering world.

     “Home is where the Heart is,” is a saying that’s often been shared.  If indeed Jesus lives in my heart, as His Word proclaims, I’m always at Home, no matter the time or location. I can indeed stay home, for Home is in my Heart! May I continue to live in that awareness of Jesus in my heart, to “stay Home” through the Immaculate Heart of Mary, the Sacred Heart of Jesus, and Home to the Heart of the Father in Heaven!

     Lord God, thank you for all the images and remembrances of Home.  Thank You for connecting the dots between Home and Heart, between Home here and Home in Heaven.  Thank you for calling us to live in communion with Your Heart, present within us, and to bring the Love of Your Heart to all we meet, to stay in the intimacy of Home with You… 

77) Call to Holiness

     A friend was sharing about a book she had recently read and enjoyed, which sounded like a nice easy read for the summer.  I ordered a copy, expecting to relax and enter into its narrative, touching on memories that resonated with my own growing up years in the country.  The book also spoke of the author’s first romance, experienced in an era of more grace and restraint than our modern culture demonstrates.  As I read of the budding romance that led to marriage, I was struck by the purity of the courtship, and surprised by how my heart was being moved, to the point that tears began to flow freely.

     I’m not one to cry often, and rarely in the presence of other people, so the intimacy of entering into this story proved to be a place where I was more open to God’s touch.  For indeed He was touching my heart, and I didn’t understand why.  When I casually mentioned my crying experience to my daughters, they asked me the “why” question, and I didn’t elaborate for two reasons.  One (1), I knew I would begin to cry again (I could feel it!), and Two (2), I didn’t know the answer. 

     A classic rule of a spiritual direction session is to bring forward the thing you least want to talk about. So, obedient to the model, I started to relate this experience to my director, and sure enough, there were the tears again, waiting to come forth! She gave me some space, and then named the word that solved the “why.”  It was “Purity.”  The beauty of witnessing 

Purity, and how it blessed the people who were embracing it in their relationship, was a grace of God.  A gift, that He wanted me to recognize and receive.

     As I thought about this reality, another conversation confirmed it for me. I was briefly mentioning being surprised by tears as I read a book, without going into any detail or speaking of purity.  My friend immediately connected with my experience, as he spoke of also being surprised by tears recently.  He was googling “stuff” and came across a clip of four little girls singing the national anthem at a football game in Texas.  He clarified that he was not drawn to any of those details; little girls, Texas, football or the national anthem. What touched his heart, as it had touched mine, was the purity, the beauty, of the singing.  Their voices were in perfect sync with one another, and the arrangement had some additional harmony that was excellent.  He found himself crying, it was so pure, and I would add, holy.

     Vatican II has called all the baptized to a Universal Call to Holiness.  I’m recognizing in this call how much Purity, a manifestation of Beauty, is central to holiness. I googled Truth, Beauty and Goodness and came up with these thoughts: “Truth, Beauty and Goodness are considered to be transcendentals, or eternal attributes of being that are present in all things created by God… God is the source of these attributes, and possesses them in their ultimate perfection… Humans, since they are made in the image and likeness of God, not only have the attributes as a reflection of Him, but are also aware of these transcendentals and are drawn to them because the desire to seek God out is written in the human heart.” (From http://www.corpuschristiphx.org, June 2021)

      These words brought great consolation to my heart, as my friend who was moved by the purity / Beauty of the little girls’ singing is presently at odds with God and outwardly resistant to His Love.  I rejoice to know that his response to  these attributes corresponds to the desire to seek God that is written in his heart!  I’ve known and believe that God has His Hand on him, and this series of events has confirmed that for me, praise God!

     Thank You Lord, for the gift of tears experienced and shared which has opened another window to Your Goodness. Thank you for Your attribute of Beauty, manifest in purity that lifts up the call to Holiness. Thank You for again weaving experiences and events together in unexpected and surprising ways to reassure me of Your love and care for those I hold in my heart.  May I continue to trust in Your Divine Providence as You make Your Goodness manifest to eyes that are open…