My older brother Bill was diagnosed with pancreatic cancer in August of 2004 – he put up a courageous battle, but kept losing weight and strength until his death on Sunday, February 6, 2005.
Saturday morning before Bill died I was spending some time in prayer for him and for his wife, Evie, who was his primary caregiver. Hospice had been called and had been helping with his care for about a week; as a hospice volunteer/sister I had been in close touch with them the last few weeks especially.
As I prayed, I began to visualize Bill’s bedroom where he had lain in bed much of the last several months, and almost exclusively these last few weeks. The room was very dark. I began to see the members of our family gathered in a circle around Bill’s bed, all holding hands and quietly praying for him – included in the circle were our older brother Ted who had died of a brain tumor in 1996, Bill’s son Jeff who had been killed by a drunk driver shor tly after his 18th birthday in 1982, his first wife Jan who had also died of cancer in 1999, and our dad who had died with Alzheimer’s in 1990. All of the living members of the family were there too, including the youngest, our granddaughter Nellie. She was standing close to Bill’s head, and she reached out her little hand, touched his forehead, and gave him a kiss. There was a luminescence around the people standing there, making a dim light in the otherwise dark room.
Then I noticed a very bright light coming from the doorway leading into the bedroom, and Jesus entered, coming to kneel by Bill’s bedside. At this time I noticed that Bill’s body was covered with huge heavy black chains – it was as though he were being crushed by the weight of the chains. He had been lying in bed in that same position for so long, and was so thin and emaciated – he weighed less than 70 pounds. Jesus reached out his hand and touched Bill, and it was as though he were gently floating on the surface of the bed – the chains had dissolved and rose up into the air like golden sparkles; their weight had been lifted and Bill was free… It struck me that this was salvation – to be free of the incredible weight of all of the pain and struggles he had endured in this life, all the hurt and disconnections. Jesus had come and set him free to be whole, and to be with God and his loved ones in heaven.
This prayer experience was a beautiful gift from God – it sustained me through the days following Bill’s death, and will be a reminder to me of the reality of salvation. We’re all walking this earth with chains of greater or lesser weight, and Jesus can set us free too, when we come to Him for healing and wholeness. Sometimes the chains themselves are so heavy they prevent us from coming to Him – that’s when we need our family and friends to help us, through prayer, and love.
I think of Jesus in the garden, sweating tears of blood, and longing for his friends to be with Him – to pray with Him and support Him in His hour of agony. I thank God for His presence in Bill’s life, enabling him to keep going when things were often so difficult, walking with him throughout his life, and coming to receive him at the hour of his death…
Lord God, thank You for the precious gift of prayer that brings us Your help and consolation, and unites us with You. May we never neglect Your call to pray with and for others, and to be with each other in our times of need ~
Spiritual Sun Pennies 